During the summer of ’11 I made the big ass mistake of forsaking my Bikram Yoga practice for more than a month: I had a two-week holiday in France, came back, created the biggest mental mindfuck ever (I’m really good at that). I didn’t go for another two weeks until my seminar with Mary Jarvis. Which let me tell you, is pretty brutal even when you have been practicing like a good little yogi, so for me that was brutal times a million.
Not only that, but not going to yoga is a bad move for me no matter how long. But a month? That’s my temporary insanity, right there. All those benefits I reap from yoga: the energy, the inner peace, the intuition, the healthy food cravings, the sleep and the physical fitness? I have to be crazy not to go willingly, right?
So sensible person that I am (ahem), I try to repeat my mistakes as little as possible. Which is why I took a yoga class on the very day we left for Munich, did some relaxed routines next to our tent while we were camping and intended to get back to my regular yoga practice as soon as we get back.
…Well, that last part went a little differently. See, my problem with yoga is that I can’t “just” go to a yoga class. I can’t “just go” to a yoga class, and leisurely start up again like a normal person. Oh, no. That would be crazy!
Instead, I get
a little ridiculously unrealistic, super-demanding and Drill Sergeant on myself. When I go to yoga after a hiatus, I need myself to get into my usual routine STRAIGHT FROM THE BEGINNING, DO FIVE 06:30 AM YOGA CLASSES IN A ROW DROP DOWN AND GIVE ME 20 SOLDIER.
Of course, this greatly clashes with the idea of yoga and for me it results in failure even before execution. You can’t go from sleeping in for two weeks straight back into standing next to your bed at 05:45. You have to get into it, ease into it.
On Wednesday, after a semi-panicked realisation I was already at 3,5 (while I had vowed never to leave the studio for more than a month), I figured any class would be better than no class so I just went to the 15:30 AM class. I was in the neighborhood, had my stuff with me and just took the class. And it was wonderful. I was stiffer than I usually am (duh), but also stronger than I remembered.
I soon eased into it completely, and not only that: I very much enjoyed it, like (almost) always. I felt like I was coming home, both in myself and the hot yogaroom. And I decided I don’t mind my muscles aching and spending so much time in the yoga studio. This is why I do Bikram Yoga. I enjoy this.
I want to live in perpetual soreness and in health.