I don’t know about you, I LOVE looking at other people’s lives on-line. CREEPER AND PROUD. I love the spectacle that is other people, the fabulous and the trainwrecks alike.
So God bless Instagram for the picture of legendary parties and amazing food, God bless Tumblr for (unattainable) luxurious lifestyle, flawless outfits, and the yoga poses I can wrap neither my head nor my limbs around. Thank the bloggers for their My Life Latelies and Insta-Diaries, thank the people who ghost-write the biographies of geniuses and socialites and celebrities. I LOVE IT ALL.
But as we are looking at other people’s lives, through all these channels and sociale media outlets, we neglect what’s directly on the outside of ourselves: What is going on in our own lives?
How do we experience our own lives? Is it something that happens in between watching tv, being immersed in the blog of some fashionista with a trust fund or watching Keeping Up With The Kardashians? Do you pay attention to what happens around YOU? In your heart and head? Or do you lose yourself in (cheap)entertainment and other distractions like work and other people?
Spending way too much time on-line instead of studying? Procrastinating instead of creating? Filling your head with so much knowledge on random celebrities you forget your own birthday? If you ask me*, we are way too interested in other people’s lives and what makes them the way they are . We easily neglect the important parts of our own lives and what makes us the way we are.
That’s kind of weird. I am not advocating egotistical narcissistical notions but instead let’s talk about a healthy enthusiastic curiosty towards your own life and your own fine self.
I mean, it’s nice to look at someone who has a dream life. It can even be an inspiration when you don’t exceed the daily recommended dosage. But if it grows into a major obstacle if you spent more time admiring someone else’s life than you do actually experiencing and living your own.
Less looking at other people’s lives, more living in your own. Less watching how other people are doing it, more experimenting and experiencing how you are doing it. Be curious about YOUR own live and all it’s aspects.
Because there are loads of fun, funny, special, unique and simply extraordinary elements in your life. Honestly, your life DESERVES your undivided attention (pro tip: this will also improve your life through less comparing to others and more engaging in your own). Not to go all Hallmark on you, but the fact that you are walking around on two legs with both a mouth and a mind is pretty fucking amazing.
I have moments where I am completely baffled by this, by the way. Kind of like a baby who discovers its own hand. The fact that I am alive, that I breathe and have brains and that I love people and shit? Um, that’s pretty amazing.
I am lucky I’m alive and I am a lucky girl for living MY particular life. Being born from two of the most emotionally stable people in the history of Homo Sapiens, with the funniest guy I know as my brother, in this big and supportive family. Living together with this amazing guy, who I’m a team with in a way I’ve never been with anyone. I enjoy the teaching that I do, the yoga, the dancing at techno parties, juicing as well as strong coffee. I think it’s unique that whenever I write, whether it flows easily or is like shitting a brick, I feel home.
There are so many unique and awesome things about my life, big and small. I should be more present in my own life and stare at those. I think you should too.
So, to start you off, tell me three unique elements about your life that you really appreciate. Whether it’s your mom, your talent or your favorite place to go, whare to share with me, and maybe remind someone else about the extraordinary in their own life.
*And for the sake of this post and pretty much ALL the stuff I write, let’s pretend that you do.
Ahh such a nice post, amen for this one because yeah, I admit I spend too much time online.
Three elements that I really appreciate: being with my best friend as the love of my life, it couldn’t have been anyone else. Having this enormous wanderlust because of my parents taking me everywhere from since I was young. How I love to speak other languages with people from anywhere: my admiration for other cultures turns out just fine because of my interest in it.
Great post, Lianne, it made me happy 🙂 I actually don’t focus much on other people’s lives – I have an aversion for Facebook (not so much to read it but most certainly to post on it), I’m a very private person. I like to watch pics on Instagram, but I hate gossip and other stuff. I’m kind of the opposite actually, of what you describe – with the constant urge to educate myself/read high quality material/extreme perfectionism, I sometimes feel a bit exhausted and in need of a break, and actually desire some mindnumbingly bad pulp.
1. My field of study, criminology, which is plain amazing and awesome and it has given me the opportunity to combine it with my biggest hobby, namely, film
2. I travel a lot, and want to travel more, and I can! I may be moving to Australia by the end of the year right after a month-long vacation in Thailand, and I am so incredibly excited about it.
3. My cat is my best friend – he fell from a window from the fourth floor last week and he survived, and actually caught a mouse yesterday, while wearing a cone over his head. So proud and happy. The surgery and the aftercare cost me a fortune but I simply don’t care.
You are sooo right. I think spending too much time online applies just like to anyone these days…but it is freaking hard to find the balance. There are so many things in my offline life I am grateful for: #1 having the most amazing husband in the world who is willing to listen and willing to take actions as well #2 having a supporting family and friends who I can always count on #3 living in the best city in Europe & enjoying the freedom and the diversity it provides.
Inspiring conversations, loving life and having an amazing, Gorgeous and talented BFF <3
The peace I find when I am drawing, the understanding I get from one of my best friends ( i love her ), Spending time outside, yes OUTSIDE, finally. I love this article btw!
Three elements that I currently appreciate in life are 1. That I am getting to know myself better, and that I got to know myself a lot better in the last couple of months. 2. Things falling into place, giving me peace inside my head and 3. Having the most loving and supporting man in my life that I could ever wish for.
Yay! I love this article too! I think I am very blessed 1. Being able to be the first ever in my family to go to the university. 2. I got to spend the last 8 months to study in Paris!! 3. And I’m very happy being a ‘happy’ joyfull person. People keep telling me that and sometimes I lose that, but I’m trying really hard to keep it that way and not get negative about life.
Ok, actually I need way more than 3 numbers!! We have great lives you all!
Such a good post. I struggled a little with this lately, life and a lot of blogging/website promotion definitely got in the way of my fitness goals for a week or two – which is the reason for my blog!
I couldn’t have read this post at a better time – the day I pushed myself to do a long run and start getting back on track 🙂
Loving this so much!
1. Mijn passie voor de muziekopleidingen binnen mijn vereniging en daar proberen iets goeds aan bij te dragen
2. Stapelgek zijn op mijn twee konijnen
3. Soms aangestoken worden door de meest avontuurlijke en tegelijkertijd heel verantwoordelijke persoon die ik ken: mijn broer.
God, I love you and your blog so much!
My 3 things are:
1. My nan: even though she’s turning 80 and I’m turning 23, we’re so much alike. She is the one person who gets me most, and without her, I don’t think i’d be where I am today.
2. Overcoming ptsd and depression: I think this speaks for itself in a way, of course I am proud of this. Also because I did it on my own and without meds, so all the progress I made is real and not due to some chemicals.
3. Starting over: I feel like I’m getting a whole new lease on life. I start school next month, after having such a shit 3years, and losing most of my friends,I get to start over and meet new people, learn new things and just grow as a person. And I’m so happy and so proud that I can say that 🙂
Oh, by no means did I mean to say I’ve kicked my mental illnesses’ butts. It’d be a miracle if I had, in such a relatively short period of time. What I meant is, I’m doing much better, I function as a semi-normal human being again and I’ve learned how to deal with my anxiety and panick attacks. I didn’t mean to say I overcame them and just lived happily ever after. But I’m determined to do so in the future.
Great article once again. If only I could follow myself on Instagram, then I could see what an amazing life I have.
Hello there! Thank you so much for everything you write, especially this one. I can’t state how much I needed to read this today. Your words brought me through stages of recognition, remorse, budding joy, and ultimately self-forgiving determination to live well from this point on.
To answer your question, I’m loving the sunflowers I (finally) bought, the pitcher of sweeter tea Mom makes just for me, and those first few seconds on the Incredible Hulk roller coaster. 🙂 These are some things that make my brain a happy place.