One step in Manifesting that throws everyone for a loop is ‘Pretending You Have Already Received It’. I mean, they’re basically telling you that you are going to have to pretend you already have the degree, the abs, the boyfriend, the peace of mind and maybe the shoes. But how do you do that without feeling like a big fat phony?
It can be super effective; if you can do it right, you start living at the exact vibration that’s necessary for the things you want to appear. If you can live like it’s already there, you invite it into your life at lightning’s speed. But, as said before it should be fun and -also important, not psychotic. I want you to start helping your reality by pretending, not losing yourself in a fantasy.
People often trip up at the whole pretending part because pretending entails: Acting as if you have something that you actually do not. In the word itself you can already see that this can possibly cause some problems. Just the act of pretending can give you the idea of ‘Oh my God, I don’t have this (yet), how sad and sucky for me!’
For instance, people who want to be wealthy and who buy something because they are pretending to be rich, can get this nagging thought and feeling about their current lesser-than-ideal financial state. That is a stressed, negative feeling that can be detrimental to the entire vibration. Similarly, if you want to be thinner, you start pretending you are thin by wearing clothing that are (too) tight, you can look in the mirror and start feeling uncomfortable about your outfit. Again, ruining what you want because the contrast is still too much.
I am here to tell you that there is a good way to pretend, and you can actually let it help you. It’s less pretend, more of a Playful Inviting thing. You don’t have to pretend you have a six figure income and a supercool job right now, if that is just too far-fetched and makes you feel even more sad and uncomfortable with the fact you’re not there yet.
First of all, only do it if it feels right and fun. The moment it only confronts you with what you don’t have and it’s making you feel bad, it’s not the right strategy for you. That’s counter effective. Only do it if you can overcome the initial weirdness and you can enjoy it as it is: a fun exercise to help attract good things.
What you can do is invite the things into your life that you want, in small ways. Small ways would include in this case, having a pretend conference call every once in a while, placing a pretend ASOS order a size smaller, writing a love letter to your Prince Charming who’s estimated time of arrival hasn’t been decided upon. Anything that’s cute, focuses on what you want, and that’s fun.
Because remember, if manifesting isn’t fun – you’re doing it wrong. If it’s not something that you enjoy doing and if it doesnt make you feel good, you’re not really doing it; you’re just making yourself feel worse, torturing yourself with the reality that’s not how you want it to be and the fantasy you don’t believe you can attain. That’s not what manifesting is. There should always be an element of fun.
So if “pretending” makes you feel phony and fake, it’s not the right thing for you. At least not yet, not right now. What I suggest you do is skip the step. Just ask what you want, feel really really good for a second imagine what it would be like and then completely let it go. Move on to the aspects of your reality that you do enjoy.
If you are able to invite that element of play and pretend into your life, I have a few suggestions.
A great way is the Making Room Technique. If you’re currently single and you want a partner, pretend you have a date coming up somewhere in the future. No specifics but just keep feeling that magic anticipation of the first date that’s semi-around the corner. You can also make a little space in your closet for a possible significant other or room mate. You can make room for a new friend by clearing out a night in your schedule. You can make room for a new and permanently fitter you by throwing away the clothes you had that are (almost) too big for you.
A similar thing you can do is Get Excited Over Your Anticipated Future. Just dream a little. What would you wear to your first press event? What would you like to say to a new boyfriend or friend? How would you like to spend your first days in a new country or at a new job?
If you want a certain something, dress for it. Dress for tat job (or that life, or that boyfriend, or that scene. Whatever). Hot journalist, strong CEO, ambitious scientist. Lots of dates, doing lots of freelance, etc. If you feel an outfit works for it, it will work for it. Fashion, beauty and appearance is a great way to pretend, even if it’s just for yourself.
Pretend-play is cool too. You can pretend you have a certain job for 30 minutes or so, right? Doesn’t have to be hard*. Write to your new lover or friends. Look for apartments in the town you want to live in some day and browse the IKEA website.
Place an order with your Universal Delivery Guy. Just order the things you want to buy and pretend they’re on their way. Always effective.
And remember, feel good about it — you should always feel good about it! One of my favorite examples of pretending is Jim Carrey, who before Ace Ventura was walking around with a pretend cheque entitling him to a couple of million dollars for Acting Performances. Look at the guy now.
The same goes for quite a few other people who weren’t quite there yet when they started making vision boards, when they started making Goal- or Wishlists, when they started to give their reality a hand becoming what they wanted it to be, with a little Play and Pretend.
*For me that’s really easy. I just sit behind my laptop with coffee or tea and type all the words.
My part time job of teaching at university is one of the reasons I love getting up in the morning. Psychology, traching and motivated, intelligent people — for the most part, of course. I’m not one to complain, but a definite albeit surmountable downside is that a part time job doesn’t come with a full time job salary. A definite glitch in my Evil Master Plan, I know.
I can make due, but last month things were a little tighter. However, instead of panicking (again, for the most part) and selling a kidney, I took a different approach. I got the Universe involved, and started working at attracting abundance. Which is a fancy term for using the Law of Attraction to bring more money into your life.
It’s not hard or anything. One strategy I used is that I really relished in the moments that I felt most abundant. Being in my yoga studio or my superfood stocked kitchen, the moments I was drinking champagne or great wine with friends or when I was surrounded by the people and things I love. Looking at my stacks of books, my wardrobe, my house. The moments I feel rich in different ways than my bank account.
In my mind, I focused on feeling abundant and taken care, and thinking thoughts that go well with that. Good financial thoughts. Like “I attract money”, “Money find its way to me” and “My finances will grow”. Make no mistake: Still paid my bills, didn’t start buying expensive stuff to trick myself into thinking I’m rich (bad move). I just felt ‘rich’ and thought positive, financial-happy thoughts.
…That was all I did. I did nothing more and all I had to do next was say ‘yes’ to the opportunities that would present themselves to me. And what do you know, they actually did.
First, Manfred’s bro needed someone to fill in for him at his hotel job. All I had to do was say ‘yes’. I spent two weeks, checking in guests in the most beautiful hotel in Rotterdam. I helped out a loved one and got paid to boot. Awesome.
Second, for the first time in my Internet history I was approached by a decent media company. Not for gambling websites ads, not US take away services links, nothing in conflict with my website or my readers. Actual things I could work with. I’ve always had to say ‘no’ but this time, I finally could say ‘yes’. Milestone if there ever was one.
I also received an e-mail from my job. If I could please stand by to teach second-year students. Again. All I had to do was say ‘yes’.
Of course I am TOTALLY disappointed there was no big bag of money falling from the sky, because that would have been a kick ass story, but these things were awesome. I’m grateful for the little financial wiggle room they gave me, and I believe that my mindset helped.
One of the reasons I got more convinced of that as I was on a roll with the abundance mindset was the unexpected side effect: Project Penny picked right back up. I am finding coins again, everywhere. While I wasn’t even focusing on coins or trying to find them! They were just there. Everywhere! Where I park my bike, on the road, on random cafeteria tables. Even (the Universe has a sense of humor) in the almost exact same situation that turned me into a believer: A coin literally rolled right under my feet as I was in the subwaystation.
For me, this is a clear as day example that however subtle and however pronounced, our minds have an impact on our realities. Cool, no? And who knows where this could lead to. Worth finding out.
My own article about realism in manifesting got me thinking — wow, there’s a narcissist statement if there ever was one. I started wondering about my own manifesting (I’ll do a longer separate post about this some other time).
Do I also try to manifest unrealistically? Absolutely. I have crazy manifesting-sessions where I go nuts on unreasonably outrageous Universal requests. I think know this can also work under the right conditions. It might require some more patience, but it’s worth it. And fun! But…when’s the right time and what’s the right way?
I believe it works best when you’re already shit-faced happy. When you’re manifesting unrealistically because you’re deeply unsatisfied with your reality, you’re setting up the wrong intention and vibe. But when you can really appreciate all the aspects of your life, when you are happy and grateful and while you are cruising on great emotions, this can rub off on all your unrealistic manifesting.
Another thing that helps is if you can do it…and then let it go completely. This is closely related to the first point: the happier you are in your current situation, the easier this will be. When you’re already happy and enjoying yourself, it doesn’t matter if it will happen soon or not. The less attached you can be, the better.
Another time to do it? When you’re bored and could use some fun outrageous dreaming. When your train is late. When you feel like it. Don’t worry too much about it. I’m not the Manifesting Police, you know.
I will always recommend Treasure Chesting unrealistic manifesting. This way you can go to town and literally put it away again. I’ve heard great stories about people doing this and finding this again when they were living in their dream home, doing what they always wanted to do or were with the perfect guy. Worth a shot, right?
Visualise yourself five years into your most perfect future ever. Ride the wave of feeling wonderful afterwards.
Write a list of things that are radically out of your financial league, perceived out-of-your-league situations you’d like to be in. Read it every once in a while, imagine having these things and being in that situation.
Feel free to place way-ahead-in-the-future orders with your Universal Waitress or Universal Delivery Guy.
What is most important is that all manifesting, realistically and unrealistically, should make you feel good. Happy, bubbly and excited for life. As long as you got that, you can manifest sideways, upwards and with glitter on top: Anyway you want.
Sometimes when you work with the Law of Attraction you can do everything right and it still won’t work. You visualize until your mind’s eye starts spinning, construct the perfect phrasings and convey the right emotions like you’re working in a chemical lab: It still doesn’t quite catch. This type of thing is exactly why the critics think they’re dealing with a bunch of hooey. But actually, what we’re dealing with is just a small obstacle in manifesting: you have made what you’ve asked for too far-fetched to swallow.
Whereas I usually think realism is an ugly term pessimists use to justify their whining, sometimes in order to succeed you have to infuse your manifesting with a healthy dose of reality. The more true something is to you, the easier you will pull it into your life.
Example time: When I was 16, I wanted to manifest 12 million euros. I had read you should set ridiculously big goals and so I did. But as I’m not using a platinum MacBook Rich with diamond letters while smelling like Nouveau Riche, you can assess the 12 million never came my way.
Here’s the thing: I was 16. I was happy enough with my mail girl salary. What the hell did I know. How on earth could I wrap my head around such exorbitant amounts of money? Or manifesting it? Or what I would do to get it? Or what I would do with it once I had it, except buy a unicorn. I had no idea what it would be like to have that much money (still don’t) nor did I really believe I could pull that off with the Law of Attraction (I do now, but that’s a story for another time).
Do I still want to manifest 12 million? Sure. But let’s start with the next 12 euros first. Then 120, 1200, 12000 and see how that turns out. It works to work your way up. I believe this is a gazillion times more effective than writing a check for an amount of money that’s more than you can possibly imagine.
I don’t think I can write it down, ask real hard, and have the cash roll in before lunch. What I do believe, if I start attracting things I know I can manifest (smaller amounts of money), it will work. Because I’ve had that kind of money before, I believe I can get/manifest it based on earlier experience and belief. It’s not far-fetched, it could work. But you can’t go from 12 euros to 12 million euros. Let’s work up. Here’s how.
1. Most of all, manifest within (or only just outside) the realms of what you feel can be reali. Attract what you already believe is possible and work your way up. So like for me, manifesting 12 million is a little too much. But how realistic is it to manifest a bonus, or to double your income this month/year? Realistic enough, people do it all the time. So you can’t believe yet you could be a size two, but how about a gorgeous size eight? You don’t believe you can manifest a happy, healthy relationship? Well, why not start with a fun date? Or a friend?
2. The moment you notice you’re becoming sceptical, you can actively tell yourself to shut up by affirmations. “Even though it doesn’t feel like a possibility now, it will be one for me eventually.”, “Even though I still sometimes can’t believe it, I trust myself/the Universe.” and “I don’t need to know how or when, I just need to know that.”
3. Manifest your way up. If you want to manifest a healthy, thin body, start out by manifesting some small weight loss victory, some weight loss opportunities (finding a fun sport, a work-out buddy, a healthy dish you like). If you don’t believe you can be wealthy, try to manifest some extra cash through whatever channel and work your way up. You can start at flirting opportunities to dates to relationships. From the first few lost pounds to skinny jeans to toned thin arms. Slow and steady! As you do this, more becomes possible for you until you nor your subconscious worries about whether or not something can or cannot be.
4. Add more realism. This is a tip I once read in a Steve Pavlina article or book: He explains you can add the realistic elements of whatever it is you want to have that are sometimes inconvenient or a downright pain in the ass.
Like figuring out taxes, hiring accountants and having to say ‘no’ to vultures, when you’re rich. Or fighting when you’re in a relationship, having to make compromises or occasionally being annoyed (or annoying). Or getting up really early to exercise, prepare healthy food or saying ‘no’ to a binge-drinking partyfest when you want to be healthy. This way the picture is colored in extra ways that might make it easier for you to really feel it is as it would be in reality.
What it comes down to, is that you have to teach yourself (and your subconscious) to believe things are possible and can become real. The easiest way to do this is through experience!
By manifesting ‘easy’, realistic things first, you start stretching the limits of what you deem possible and what you consider within your reach. Always work up. Before you know it you’re manifesting shit you considered impossible a few years before. Who knows, you might manifest that crazy-ass 12 million of mine.
I was reading Gabby Bernstein’s first book this weekend, called ‘Add More ~Ing To Your Life (a book review later this week). Whereas the entire book was better than I remembered from the first time, I read something so inherently awesome I couldn’t resist some premature sharing.
Background Story: Gabby is coaching this woman who is working with the Law of Attraction: trying to manifest a relationship. Like most of us, the woman gets a little impatient. Because you know, sometimes shit takes long. Is our Universal Delivery Man lost? Has the Universal Waiter or Waitress forgotten our order? No.
“She became incredibly impatient about when and how she was going to meet her man. This energy became a major block toward attracting. In the hopes of calming her down, I offered her a tool that would chill her out. I reminded her that the Universe is like her best girlfriend. I asked her if she would ever pressure any of her girlfriends to find her a boyfriend. She replied, “No.” Then I asked her whether her girlfriends wanted her to find true love, and ithey were truly out to help her. She said, “Of course they’re out to help me! They can’t wait for me to fall in love!”
Then I went on to explain that the Universe was no different than any of her best friends. The Universe wants Jessica to fall in love and wants nothing more than for her to be happy. I suggested she connect with the Universe as if they were best friends who wanted to support one another’s desires. She dug this idea and it really helped her chill out.”
I dig this idea too! I’ve made it into my own metaphor. See, the Universe is your best friend and he/she is in the Universal Kitchen, cooking up a storm for you, creating a meal of all your Desires.
Now, are you going to tell your best friend exactly what to do from all the way in the living room? Are you going to demand specifics, complain about how long he/she is taking and take out your impatience on her/him? God, I hope not. If so, you really are one lousy dinner guest. So chill out. Sit back, relax, have a drink and entertain yourself while there is all this wonderful delicious stuff going on in the kitchen. You’ll get to that later.
In my head, the Universe is my Best Buddy Delivery Guy. I ask, he delivers and not just that: I always get more than I expect and he’s fucking friendly! I can tell he wants the best for me! And you know what? If he arrives a little late with my packages, I still love him! He’s a nice dude, he means well and even if it may take a while, he always comes through for me. The Universal Delivery Guy is my homeboy.
When you know the Universe And Everything Else isn’t out to get you but out to help you, that makes it a whole lot easier to relax and let things come to you. Worth a shot.
As promised, I’d wrap up what I learnt this past month about working with the Law of Attraction and manifesting things into your life. This was a very Conscious Manifestation month and this brought a lot of new things to my attention.
First of all: Everything starts with your mindset and the things you think.
This is basically the building block of life. If you manage to guide your thoughts and navigate your mindset (at least most of the time, nobody’s perfect) you may go through hard times but you will always be on the right path and steering towards the right things, learning as you go along. Which is cool!
Second, Project Penny is something everyone should give a try.
Yes, you too! It trains your ‘Manifest Muscle’ in a couple of ways. You already believe you can do it: you know they’re out there, other people drop them all the time. All you have to do is keep your eyes open! Then, as you find more of them in ‘coincidental’ ways, your faith in the Law of Attraction and yourself grows and it becomes easier to move on to bigger things.
It’s more efficient to attract money for the things you want than money in general.
It usually holds a much stronger desire, is more vivid and has more details, and The Universe loves it when you’re specific. Steve Pavlina says it’s like playing a video game and obsessing about the score, while there is so much more interesting things to focus on in a computer game (other characters, possible items, etc). I am beginning to think the man has a point.
Friday, I was thinking I wanted to attract 120 euros for my next Unlimited Yoga Month Card and forgot about it again. Saturday morning, I get a call from someone I know who needs me for two babysit gigs this week (Yes, I’m 24 and I still babysit. What can I say? Kids love me!). That type of manifesting, opportunity to make some money practically overnight, is very interesting to me and I think it’s because it’s not about the money so much (the score) but about the purpose that it’s going to serve.
I intend to keep an open receiving mindset too: if you don’t limit yourself to getting money, who knows what you’ll get? Exciting!
When trying to manifest things it is important it is to feel free.
For a while there I accidentally restricted myself: I was kind of stuck in my diet and judgmental of the things I ate without changing it (such as destructive coffee habit), without trying to break free from it. In my head, only yoga was important to feel good in terms of exercise and that put such a pressure on my yoga practice I got in my own way with overthinking.
I now realize you shouldn’t feel restricted in this area (or in any area), you should always feel limitless. The moment I got back into my ‘Well, what do you want to eat?’ and ‘What do you want to try?’ and ‘What do you want to do next?’ attitude, things felt better. It’s better to look for opportunities instead of keeping yourself in locked and already-decided-on actions. started to do things for clear, pure energy again and that really liberates.
If you want good relationships, you’re going to have to see the good in relationships.
Focus is incredibly important when you’re working with the Law of Attraction, and I fell into the classic mindfuck-trap of wanting better relationships, which does not mean your relationships are shit, you just want them to be even more wonderful, you accidentally enter World Opposite by only seeing everything that is wrong, might be wrong and could be wrong about your relationships. Do not make this mistake!
By all means, talk about the shit aspects of your relationships. Get them out in the open, work on them, but let them go and focus on the great aspects and how appreciative you are of them. Once you’ve spent some time improving them, relax. Let it go. Open your eyes and see the wonderfulness of the people around you once again.
Be a positive person in the workplace.
I’m not saying you have to be Snowwhite of the Office, singing while birds follow you around the cubicles, but you have no idea how much it could help you. Not only are you a breath of fresh air in comparison to your less enthusiastic co-workers for anyone who comes in there (which gives you an automatic advantage), you also teach yourself to spend your every workday while vibrating on high levels, which is great for manifesting.
Wear a friendly face wherever you go.
The great thing about being generally happy (for me at least) is that I usually look very approachable. Having huge wide eyes probably helps too – people might think I see more or have GPS/The Internet installed in them so I am their best bet for pointing them in the right direction, but I smile a lot and don’t immediately look away if I look into another person’s eyes. This leaves a lot of room for potential social interaction, which sometimes people really need.
It’s fun, people like to talk to you and it’s easy to get to know new interesting people this way, so I recommend looking friendly, like you’re willing to be nice to everyone*.
And that’s that for today, folks. I’m going to have a wonderful dinner with Lin and then tomorrow I’m finally seeing Sabine again: I’m attending her Detoxing Made Easy Workshops. I do hope the enema talk is kept to a minimum though, because I’m not really ready for that. 😐 Anyway, have a lovely weekend!
*Okay, not everyone. I personally have excellent Creep Radar, but if you don’t, be careful with this one. Last thing we need is you taking candy from a stranger.
I promised I’d give you a run down of the things I’ve been able to manifest the past couple of weeks. I think it went pretty well and although I didn’t manifest everything, both what did come into my life and what didn’t gave me some useful lessons. I like this exercise a lot: I think it helped a lot tuning my mind into the right things as well as pick up a few lessons about the Law of Attraction here and there. This post is dedicated to how the manifesting went, the lessons I picked up along the way I’ll share with you in another post! Enjoy!
Money:Project Penny is crazy at the moment: I find coins everywhere. I find coins all over the house, on the floor wherever I am, in the subway station, and also in old jeans, boxes around the house, hardly used purses. The funny thing is that I pick up a coin, put it in my pocket and completely forget about it again until I empty out my pockets for laundry or clean out my purse or bag a while later. I’ve gathered quite a collection.
The little jar I use.
4,50 in coins (all found in this month), a token of a club we go to a lot, two perfume samples I got when I bought some make-up and a lighter I got from a friend. For the record, I’ve been a social smoker before but I kind of lost my appetite for occasional nicotine lately. Now I just use the lighter to light candles and incense. Oh, how things change.
I can also add to that a babysitting gig that just came up out of the blue (20 euros), a belated birthday gift (50 euros), two unexpected Girl Meets Yoga payments (22 euros), I dare to say that May was a financially successful month. I’m not really sure if I should be including tax refund and vacation money because one could argue that stuff always comes in May. Still, I’m still very grateful and appreciative for that too.
Also, I’d be neglectful if I wouldn’t tell you an anecdote of me and my friend Lin that occurred a couple of weeks back at Soenda. We got tokens for food and drinks and we weren’t sure to get 12 or 16. We decided on 12 and when we were walking across the festival field Lin notices something: 4 tokens.
I hate to break out the .gif again guys, but come on:
What I’ve noticed mostly about manifesting money is not so much about the money, but that I get a lot in general! Gifts, such as my dad getting me these cute notebooks he thinks I will like, my best friend dropping off a yoga magazine for me to read or free fruit on the market. Also, other little perks like the coffee girl asking me if I’d like an extra cup around my hot latte (which they actually aren’t allowed to give when you ask), the guy who asks me if I want a glass of ice with my water at a festival. I noticed these things a lot, and they’re really nice.
Health: I have been doing yoga, but it was only nearing the end of this that I cut the shit short and started going every day. Funny though: it’s only just now that I’m really in the mood for other sports too. I want to do a little more running, go swimming for an hour every few weeks and maybe try out Pilates and other types of yoga too. The iHerb order has not been delivered yet (ARGH) but I’m getting it Tuesday, I’ll write about it then. I’ve also found a place where they sell white mulberries, I’ve been eating a lot of salads, superfood smoothies and other healthy stuff. Oh, and I cut the shit short on coffee too: I quit. Which is kind of a big deal for me. Awesome.
Love & Friendship: Very coincidentally (I think not!), I did catch up with old friends from high school at our reunion and that was a lot of fun. Honesty bids me to tell you that the past month hasn’t been great for this area, though. When a new balance needs to be found in whatever type of relationship, things rock back and forth for a bit first. Things are feeling less wobbly now though, which is great for my inner balance too, but I’m taking this month as a time period that was necessary for things to improve.
Work & Writing: This is going pretty well. A few days after I wrote this post on what I wanted to manifest I had the performance review hat led to the renewal of my contract as well as some possibilities for extra hours. Inspired action: Check, and this is bringing me some interesting prospects (it’s amazing what a simple sent e-mail can do). I am writing a lot, having a lot of ideas and feeling a lot of love in this area from readers. Hearts and sparkles to you all.
Beauty & Fashion: No white tee or jeans yet, but I’m loving my off-shoulder sweaters, baggy jeans and sneakers as of late and wear a dress and high-heeled boots once a week. You know, so people won’t think I’m a boy. Make-up wise I could still do a little better, but I have a little Au Natural routine that I spice up with smokey eyes or red lipstick every few days. It works, I guess!
An interesting new person to be friends with: The more I think about it, the more I realize that although I didn’t find one specific potential friend, I had a lot of postive and inspiring interactions with new people as of late: definitely even more than usual! Met one adorable reader (plus boyfriend) who I hope to see again someday, got to hang out with a bunch of yogis and the most inspiring yoga teacher I’ve had in a while last weekend, and students who gave me awesome reading recommendations. Instead of one new friend-prospect, I just had a whole lot of positive and inspiring interactions.
Champagne! –Kind of silly, it was always here in the cabinet: My boyfriend still had a Moet from our last holiday. Now along with the champagne, we gotta find the time to drink it, so I might have to focus my attention on that first. 😉
Young Thai coconuts for smoothies and coconut water: CANNOT FIND THESE ANYWHERE IN ROTTERDAM SO FAR. FRUSTRATING!
A festival ticket: This didn’t manifest, but I believe my focus is going to be entirely elsewhere for the upcoming time and I don’t mind one bit. Because my desire has shifted from going to festivals and partying to other things, I don’t think it’s going to show up anytime soon. But who are we kidding: if it does, I’ll go.
Poetry fridge magnet set (always wanted one!): Not yet!
Raw honey: Check! After checking out the organic supermarkets and health food stores and not being able to find it, I realized iHerb is the answer for everything health food-related and got it there. It wasn’t even as expensive as I had feared, so I’m pleased.
A plant for in the dining room: Not yet, but I do realize now that I want an orchid so that’s a little more specific and I intend to get one soon.
So all in all, a pretty good month. Not everything and not everything as expected but I believe there is a definite improvement in my speed and specifics when it comes to the Law of Attraction. Let’s just keep training, shall we? Blog on specific things I’ve learnt from this coming soon! Happy Sunday!
This is one technique that is very powerful when it comes to manifesting things you want: It’s thorough, fun, and there is a big empathis of letting go. You can do this exercise once every six months, a year, maybe even less and you store the box with your wishlists until at a certain point, you’ve actually forgotten everything you’ve asked for. When you then open the box again and you’re usually amazed at how much of the things might have come true for you.
What you need:
– A box of some sorts. Maybe a shoe box, a special little chest or cabinet. A big envelope may also do.
– Sheets of paper, small envelopes are a nice touch but optional
– A pen
1. Write Down What You Want. You can do the writing down what you want in a few different ways. You can make one giant list of things you want, write it in story form, or you can divide it into different subjects and write down statements. I always do the latter (my head likes the illusion of me being organized like that): I have a few different pages and I head them with things like ‘Relationships’, ‘Material Stuff’, ‘Health, Body & Fitness’, ‘Money’, ‘Work’, etc. Then I start listing things I want.
For example, under Work I list a monthly salary I eventually want to have, an ideal job description, perks of my jobs and opportunities I wish to come see my way (such as eventually being able to do workshops!) I always write it in terms of “I’m so happy I now have X amount of salary” or “I am so thrilled my job offers so much challenges”, etc: like it is in the present.
2) Semi-Optional: You can reread the list, the stories or the statements. It might give you a good extra boost before you put them away. If you do, imagine these things to be yours, how awesome that is and how happy that makes you. Feel the love for the things that shall be yours.
This is ‘my box’. Ahem. A friend gave it to me as a house warming gift and I love it so, so much.
3) Finally, you put them in the box and put it away somewhere. And now, you just go live your life. By putting it away you send off a signal that you trust the Universe to take care of it. You don’t set a deadline or any other limit, you don’t obsess, yo basically say to the Universe: “Here you go: I made it clear what I want. Now I’m going to do my thing while you go do yours! Cheers!”
And now, you just go live your life! You study, you do your work, you hang out with your friends and you work on your long-time fantasy novel, your Mandarin or your people-skills, while you let the Universe work out the timeframe, technicalities and other specifications of everything that you asked for.
Now, as I did this this week, I decided to make it an experiment. Six months from now I’m going to reopen the box and see how much of my statements have actually come true. Not only nice to add some experiential support to the website as well as figure out the areas in life I am still getting in the way of myself in, that might be interesting too. Deal? Deal.
Pssssh: If you want to try it too, drop me a line in the comments or let me know through e-mail! That way we can maybe incorporate your results in the post about this on the 16th of January 2013. If we’re still alive by then. Mayan calender and what not.
An interesting question arose in the comments* about the limits of the Law of Attraction. Because sometimes there’s a point where you should stop, because if you don’t, that’s just a little sad and/or creepy.
What if you don’t get that house, that job, that boyfriend? Do you keep holding on, trying to manifest them into your life? Do you let go? And isn’t that giving up? Are you now a Law of Attraction Loser? And if you push through, where is the line and does working with the Law of Attraction become stalking, obsessive and psych-ward worthy?
Well, my sweets, here’s what I think about all that.
First of all, I have no doubt in my mind that there is a certain point where it’s time to move on. This might be after applying thirty times to the job you really want. This might be after you’ve serenaded your ex (please don’t ever do this) and he or she has thrown tomatoes at you. This might be after a year of zero visitors who really gave a shit about your website.
But there will come a point in time where you feel it: Enough. That’s the moment where your inner everything will shouts ‘YOU NEED TO STOP NOW’ and you intuitively know: I am done.
If you can’t yet recognize this moment, you will eventually learn how to because you’re going to get smacked by the Universe and it will be unpleasant. After a while, you’ll learn. And if you just ignore the signs and still push through with a temper tantrumesque ‘…but I want it, mommy! I want it, I want it!’ attitude?
That’s not working with the Law of Attraction anymore. That’s forcing things and that’s only going to result into shit. You’re just acting like a pushy and stubborn child who doesn’t get a toy in the store of life; because you don’t know how to deal a setback. Because you’re afraid if you let go of this one thing you are never going to find anything as good.
I got news for you, sweetheart. You are going to find even better things. But first you need to get a grip. I cannot work with you when you’re on the floor, pounding your fists and crying and screaming. Neither can the Universe so get it together, dammit.
Not getting what you (think you) want? Can sometimes be the best thing that could have happened. So when your lover dumps you while you are still madly in love with him, that might mean that you need to grow separately before your relationship can really work out long-term. It might mean he’s not right for you and someone else is waiting out there. It might mean you need to find yourself the way every girl in the movies does when her boyfriend dumps her. Think Legally Blonde, just not as stupid.
It sucks that you’re never hired for that job you want so bad, but apparently the Universe thinks it’s better if you start working somewhere else. Or stay at your current firm and get a promotion beyond your wildest dreams? Or just stop working at all and join a band. Whatevs.
You might have a basic understanding of the things you want. But you don’t know everything and sometimes the Universe steps in to remind you of that fact and to nudge (okay, throw) you in the direction that you were really always supposed to go in. That’s where you find the things that are really good for you and that will really satisfy you beyond what you could have imagined.
Whenever I miss out on an opportunity I really wanted, I am bummed for a little and then I think: “Hey. This means there is something even more awesome out there for me.” I’m always right. I was rejected for a super-prestigious teacher-traineeship that I thought was perfect for me. A month later I got a 2-year contract at my current job (that I am in love with) with the extra teaching opportunities I’ve always dreamed of. Coincidence? I think not.
Because there’s endless possibilities and opportunities. So if you really want to waste your time throwing rocks at the closed door of Ex Boyfriend/Potential Dream Job You Didn’t Get/Anything, you don’t see the windows opening, the doors creaking open and other opportunities peeking at you from them.
When manifesting, I always remind myself that I don’t need to know the how’s, the when’s or other technicalities. Shit will just come my way, through whatever channel, in whatever way at times they’re supposed to. Just the other day I got a belated birthday gift (while I already pretty much had forgotten about my 24th): manifesting money was on my list, and it manifested.
I always keep an open mind. I don’t know anything. I don’t know how or when or in what way. I just know that things go and come my way.
So you had one shitty date. Of course you can be bummed out about that for a while, but why not look around a little better after that. Maybe there’s more around you than you realized. Have you ever noticed that your cute nerdy co-worker talks to you a little more than he does to most girls? Or that the guy you spot at the cafeteria smiles at you everytime you meet? Or the messages from that old high-school friend who cleaned up very nicely after braces and puberty?
So the house you wanted went to someone else. Did you spot that ‘for rent’ sign on the way to work? Did you overhear a friend talking about sub-leasing her loft? Did you see something similar to what you wanted on-line but didn’t focus on it because you had your eyes on this other house?
Law of Attraction includes you having a broad-spectrum antibiotic-like focus: widely applicable and effective. No more tunnel vision for you. Broad mind, eyes wandering, ears keen, all senses looking for opportunities and possibilities. That way you see everything and that way you can spot more opportunities than just the ones you think are The Ones for you.
Because you may think you know, and sometimes you’re right, but the Universe sometimes knows best and has no problem stepping in and ‘ruining’ things for you. Question is if you’re flexible enough to adapt, and I’m pretty sure that if you accept that you don’t know everything, that better things are apparently ready-ing themselves for you and if you are able to keep your eyes and mind open, I’m pretty sure things will turn out okay. Good luck.
*my readers are smart, inquisitive (and let’s not forget sexy) and inspire half of my articles. Thank you for that. Your questions and suggestions are always brilliant.